Am I

is just...sometime i think do i will ever really fall for someone...Am i cold bloody?
i just cant really have someone tat i like or even love....is not like i don't have feeling to the opposite sex,just sometimes i could get really confuse..am i do really like him,or is just some admire feeling...
ya.. i do have some FEELING toward someone recently,but is that really means what i taught? or is it just a temporary crush?
I don't know why...but i do think i have some kind of special "power" , i can stop myself from truly like someone, when i ever start to have some special feeling to a guy,i will just keep sending message to my brain : is just a temporary crush ,is just a temporary crush..... by then, i will just over him quickly...
i also wondering why am i always do this to myself,i am the 1 tat keep saying wan to like someone,wan to have that kind of feeling too just like my friends does...but i am the reason that i could not really into someone else...guess that i am just too afraid of that kind of feeling (like fall in love) ,is new n terrifying to me...
while i typing this,i check the time, and it is 12:12am... never taught i will spend my precious sleeping time to blogging...but this taught just keep flowing over my head : Am i will going to really fall in "love" to someone?

sometimes i taught could just don care,
but thing turns out i cannot stop thinking about ...
i did care so much...

强

我觉得，我自己从来都是坚强的，尽量都不会让自己因为伤心而哭，因为那就显得我懦弱，我懦弱，就不能保护身边的人，保护他们对我来说是一辈子的责任，朋友.家人.我通通都要保护。。我要让自己和身边的人都觉得，我比他们坚强，这样.....我就会有足够的能力，去保护我想保护的人。

每每到了夜深人静，我就会静静地哭泣，哭过了，就会责怪自己，怎么那么差！前边还有很长远的路，更加让人伤心的经历也会接二连三地来，如果因为这件事就哭，以后该怎么过。

所以，总是让自己大气地过日子，傻气地，酱会让自己过得更容易。。

ready......

ok....im going to form 6!!! am i ready??
guess im going form6 is just because im not ready...
there got lot of people ask me : Y? y u want to continue study on form6??
and i didn answer them, because i don know wat my answer would be....
now.... i think i had figure my answer out...
is because when i recall my memory in secondary school life, i realize i do nothing for the most amazing part of my life -- secondary school's life.....

im afraid .... so im always becoming 'good girl' ,but i not proud of this...i want to do something that when im get old , i remind the school life of mine, i will smile n think about how stupid am i doing such a thing, but never regret because im doing tat....cuz i doing my job perfectly, my job as a student,enjoying my school life...

for the last 5 years, i do think i didn have enjoy my school life enough, and now .....for the last two years, i wan to be really enjoy......just do wat im like...cuz i would never get a chance to back to this time.....

想找朋友出来看电影，却发现原来我的朋友是这么的少。。。

some movie got inspired happy ending is just because it never end..........

我。。真的是无言了，事实真是残酷的很
还是我真的有那么差？？